How Often Do You Fly
Frequent Flyer’s Ten Golden Rules
- No flight ever leaves on time unless you are running late and need the delay to make the flight.
- If you are running late for a flight, it will depart from the farthest gate within the terminal.
- If you arrive very early for a flight, it inevitably will be delayed.
- Flights never leave from Gate #1 at any terminal in the world.
- If you must work on your flight, you will experience turbulence as soon as you touch pen to paper. Or start to drink your coffee.
- If you are assigned a middle seat, you can determine who has the seats on the aisle and the window while you are still in the boarding area. Just look for the two largest passengers.
- Only passengers seated in window seats ever have to get up to go to the lavatory.
- The crying baby on board is always seated next to you.
- The best-looking woman/man on your flight is never seated next to you.
- The less carry-on luggage space available on an aircraft, the more carry-on luggage passengers will bring aboard.
Airlines Acronyms Explained
Alitalia: Airplane Landed In Tokyo And Luggage In Atlanta
Alitalia: Always Late In Take-off Always Late In Arrival
American: Airline Meals Eaten Regularly Induces Cramps and Nausea
BOAC: Better On A Camel
Delta: Don’t Ever Leave The Airport
Delta: Don’t Expect Luggage To Arrive
El Al: Every Landing Always Late
Olympic: Onassis Likes Your Money Paid In Cash
PIA: Perhaps I’ll Arrive
Sabena: Such A Bad Experience – Never Again
SAS: Sex After Service
TAP: Take Another Plane
TWA: That Was Awful
TWA: Try With Another
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